I’m My Own Press

As the alarm clock went off, I jumped out of bed. The Media can’t be late for this game coverage. U.N.C.L.E. said Captain Chin wanted all to report to Cage at 7.45am and so said the clock while I was at the last junction, waiting for the light to change. With my stomach growling, I bluffed myself that the reporting time referred to players only and not me. So I bought my breakfast before driving my way in, praying that they (our team) won’t KO without me.

Spotting Chin, I quickly found out that Biao Shu has just reached with U.N.C.L.E. We quickly settled down at the nearby coffeeshop and waited for others to arrive. The clock ticked by as Biao Shu wolfed down his fried noodles, and Ian made his appearance. He told us he had a bottle of volka last night and U.N.C.L.E. started worrying about Ian being dehydrated.

The topic then changed to how to punish Raphael who wanted everyone to report at 7.45am. U.N.C.L.E. suggested that Raphael play without his underwear, but Biao Shu said he might enjoyed it. Biao Shu’s proposed that Raphael just play without something. Shorts, shirt…anything, but underwear.

Worried that co-captain Raphael might still be in bed, I rang to confirm that he was indeed on his way down. The moment he “touched down”, U.N.C.L.E. make it known that U.N.C.L.E. has actually told U.N.C.L.E.’s mother to wake up at 6am to call him, after which U.N.C.L.E. was to wake Biao Shu up. Peter announced that he had already had his nap in his car! Hahah!

Rongming and Bryan Wong’s “materialising” at the coffeeshop took away all the attention from Raphael. Both of them were in other teams and Chin labelled them traitors. The Big Red One (our innovative team name) was to meet Eagles first at 10am. Then U.N.C.L.E. realised he didn’t have the right coloured top for the teams. They were to wear black. So Biao Shu lend U.N.C.L.E. his spare top, and U.N.C.L.E. kept saying “I love the smell of Biao Shu”! And he can repay this loan in the car later, when they are going back. Hahahaha!

The boys changed into the gear. Some did their warm-ups, others just. As Biao Shu put on his gloves, The Big Red One KO against the Eagle in Pitch 2. The Eagle went for the jugular right from the start, and moments into the game, one of them was yellow-carded for a foul on Peter. After two good saves by Biao Shu, Faiz shouted out loud “Your hair is still stylo!” Hahaha. Before we knew it, the game was over and The Big Red One lost two-nil.

I hinted to Biao Shu to watch how other teams organised their backline, and they just have to be less cautious in their approach to the next game – lose it and we will be out. U.N.C.L.E. replaced Ian for the second game and Raphael had two tries in the first five minutes. This time, Biao Shu was shouting instructions to the rest of them. He had became their eyes as the game proceed, fast and furious. U.N.C.L.E. made two clearances with his head, and just before the change-over, Peter broke the deadlock. He then added another just after they changed sides. Not to be outdone, Raphael made it 3-nil and we secured the three points.

Everyone agreed that with Biao Shu’s classroom style instructions, they were able to play better as they just react at his commands. The downside was, Raphael earned a yellow-card for sliding the opponent.

In Game 3, Ian made a header clearance to keep our boys in the game. With much better coordination and teamwork, Peter scored the solitary goal of this game and we are through to the quarter-finals. Faiz commented that Biao Shu looked like Eric Cantona when he picked up the ball after a hand, pacing around the keeper’s zone with his usual swagger.

The Big Red One faced off against Bryan’s team, and Raphael KO with his battle scars – cuts he’s gotten from sliding the opponent and he made it 1-nil immediately after the referee blew for second-half. Despite Biao Shu instructions for the boys to come back to cover him, the opponents scored and it was down to penalty. Chin scored the first one, but he forgot to wait for the whistle and thus has to retake the penalty. His shot was saved, though I must say the physique of keeper gave him fewer options since he has already blocked more than two-thirds of the goal-mouth. Biao Shu gave the opponent much more choices and we were knocked out.

While we were all sitting outside as the boys get their breaths back, U.N.C.L.E. noticed that Raphael was wearing his shin-guard, and asked did he went to get his shin guard while everyone was waiting for him to KO for the third game. I gave U.N.C.L.E. an exasperated look and said, “No lah! He has been wearing them since the first game! S.L.O.W!!!”

With Peter sitting to U.N.C.L.E.’s left and Biao Shu on his right, U.N.C.L.E. started to stroke Peter’s thigh. Taking away some of the details, Peter told U.N.C.L.E. to transfer the attention to Biao Shu, to which U.N.C.L.E. answered, that can wait cos we will be getting into his car! Biao Shu gave up and walked away, and Ian unknowingly sat down and Peter said, try the hairy one. U.N.C.L.E tried and concluded that he doesn’t like hairy ones! I gave up!

Raphael joined Rongming’s team (Chinese Drama) after The Big Red One was knocked out. We stayed on to support our friends as they take on teams from other organisations. He entered the fray in the second-half and Rongming scored the solitary goal for Chinese Drama went through to the Final.

It was down to penalty shoot-outs for the final, and Faiz, having kept six clean sheets in six games eventually gave in to fatigue and they had to settle for second-place in the competition. Raphael was the only one who had a trophy to bring home, while I thoroughly enjoyed myself being the one unofficial “press” member. To quote Biao Shu, I’m my own press!